World Cup And Regrets

world cup

I love watching the world cup! We’ve always enjoyed it as a family ever since I was very young. It’s a nice time where we all come together and yell, laugh and construct everything we see. I have fond memories of me and my older brother wearing our bright yellow Brazil shirts and cheering for Ronaldo. We were always huge Brazil fans and I find myself still holding on to it even though I know they’re not the same players. I know what you’re thinking. That loss to Germany in 2014. It was so embarrassing and painful! But I like how you can recognize how good another team is. It’s all good. Even when a team loses I don’t think anyone is ever happy that they lost. When a team plays good you know they deserve to win.

It’s always this time in my life that I remember how much I love football. Not just watching it, (because I only ever watch the world cup) but playing it. I remember playing football in school and with my brother and cousins. We would have huge matches and it was the best! Kicking and tacking the ball feeling as if you have some skills and power. It was an amazing feeling. As I grew up we slowly stopped playing football which was inevitable, I guess, although it was also due to other reasons rather than just growing up. The regret comes in when I made a decision I wish I hadn’t in school. I remember playing football in P.E and not to toot my own horn, I was kicking everyone’s ass, and I think that’s because the rest of the girls didn’t care about the sport like I did. They didn’t grow up playing it and weren’t taking it as seriously as me. That day in P.E we were split into two and for some reason we had sixth formers refereeing the games which was very random and never happened again. After the game was done one of the sixth formers approached me and told me I was really good and should join their football team. Apparently he was a coach and was looking for players to join his team. You probably know where this is going. I didn’t join. Even now thinking about that missed opportunity upsets me. I could have played a sport I loved, learnt awesome skills and gained so much. I wish I could go back and shake some confidence in myself because it was a hundred percent my social anxiety that held me back. I wanted to do it, but I was too afraid. Afraid of so many things I won’t list and bore you. If you have social anxiety you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. I can’t change what happened and I can’t let myself dwell on my missed opportunities. I have to remind myself there’s a reason for everything and I wouldn’t have ended up where I am today if my life took another turn, and I don’t know if me taking that offer would have been better or worse for me. At least watching it is still enjoyable, am I right? My younger brother is the only one who plays with me when he wants to which is not often because he usually plays with his friends. Sadly my skills are extremely nooby and my kicks are weak af. Is it weird if a grown woman practices football in her garden for fun? Lol. I look like a teenager so maybe I can get away with it.

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